February 2025

 And now it is almost the end of February. 

Where do I start? Steve is healing from the knee break.  In the meantime, I had a Coronary Calcium CT. The results were terrible. I am waiting to see a Cardiologist. This has caused so much anxiety, but as I sit here today, I am feeling calm and peaceful. I believe it is because I have used all my tools to keep myself from doom and dread.  The book Beyond Anxiety by Martha Beck couldn't have come at a better time.  I saw a Counselor this week who tried a new method of therapy  called A R T or Accelerated Resolution Therapy. I was able to work on the core memory that is at the center of my PTSD and change it.  I can't even begin to explain what a miracle of timing and circumstance this is for me.

We have worked jig saw puzzles while the snow  fell. We worked another one before this. It was so calming to find the smiling faces of my friends again and again in all the pictures. 

I found a place to source a DIY fairy house. I just started building it yesterday, I am trying to find creative things to do that are life affirming.  I am beginning to decorate again and come up with new ways to arrange things.  I am trying new recipes, good, Mediterranian recipes, creating anything helps a positive mindset. I am so excited about the fairy house. 

There was Valentine's Day dinner at home

I found a cute little fairy house at Target.

My sister, Sissy died a few days before her 82 birthday.  We had her funeral that day. I saw my cousin Ron, Ronnie who I haven't seen since we were kids.  He looks a lot like his Dad.  And I got to see my Uncle Jerry who is 90+.  My sister's celebration was just lovely. It was perfect for her.  Now the business of living without her on this plane begins.  I have been writing. letters and journal entries to her.  I have been asking for her help. She has been in memory care for a few years now and non-communicative, now in a strange way, it feels like I have her back. I can talk to her again and communicate with her.  

I took a hike with friends on Tuesday, 2.75 miles, beautiful! 

And so, we continue on into the last day of February and the beginning of March.